fight the GOOD fight..

Watching Flags of Our Fathers's this evening, has me reflecting on what my family has fought for in the name of this country.

My grandfather was a hand to hand combat soldier in World War II. Everytime I watch "Saving Private Ryan" I always think of how my Grandfather was there, doing that very thing I am watching, "playing" war but not being able to shout "STOP!" when it got to much for you or you were losing.

He never talked about fighting in the war to me of course, I was only about 8 when he passed on, but I do remember how I loved to play with his thumb on his right hand, or lack of it. His thumb was missing on that hand, and I always remember how there was an X right down the middle of that missing skin. I used to love to touch it and marvel at it, and he never pushed me away or made me stop. I never asked him how it came to be gone, but later, as I got older, my Hoo'oo told me it was shot off in the war. I can't imagine my gentle giant of a grandfather fighting with anyone, much less in a war. He was only 19 when he was shipped off, and my grandmother was pregnant with my Mom while he was away. My mom says she remembers my grandmother telling her that he used to write her of how much it smelled there, of death, that sickly metal smell of blood.

I remember looking at pictures of him in his uniform, my grandfather was such a handsome young man. My mom used to yell at me cause I used to always get that white picture album down from the closet and just stare at how time passed through the people I loved.

Watching that movie tonite, with so much of it dedicated to Ira Hayes, A fellow O'odham from across the city, made me cry for my Grandfather and what he much have gone through.

How can anyone see the face of death and be the same after?

My grandfather became a minister, and he and my grandmother and my aunties and uncle moved all over the Southwest O'odham lands preaching the good word.

I often wonder if my Grandfather became a minister ino rder to reconcile what had been done overseas. Of course, I never bring that up to my Grandmother or Mom. But, I always think about it.

Placed in that situation, I don't know if I would have it in me to fight.

But I know that I sure am glad that there were those who were able to fight so that I am here today, writing im this stupid blog, about a situation that thankfully I may never know.

I guess in a way that's why I feel so passionately about showing respect to the flag. Maybe because I have some idea of all the blood behind it.

For those Native's who fought against it, and for those who fought for it.